So I have a guest writer for today’s Positive Purposeful Post. I am thankful my beautiful daughter, Kloie, pulled this quote from my personal LFTG jar today. I hope you are inspired by her thoughts below. As promised I always show you the good . . . and while it is usually at the end she shows you plenty of good throughout. Enjoy . . .
And if I asked you to name all the things you believe in – how long would it take for you to name yourself?
Recently, as in the past two and a half months, I have started to find myself. For years I thought I had figured out who I was and convinced myself that I was happy with my life. Then I got a glimpse of reality and noticed I wasn’t really happy nor did I approve of myself. I felt the need to wear what everyone else was wearing or put on makeup because all the other girls were doing it. I’ve always been the type of person who doesn’t follow the crowd, even if that means I’m left by myself. But then I began to notice I was trying to copy what other people were doing. This made me feel even worse. Being at the school I was at, I thought I’d never find my true self.
Then I got accepted into GSSM (The Governor’s School for Science & Math) and my spirit just became brightened again – like I hadn’t seen it since – well, I don’t even know when. I began to feel that this was my time to uncover who I wanted to be as a person and how to be at peace with myself even when today’s society has certain standards many women/girls feel obligated to live up to.
My parents introduced me to Asheville in early Spring. This exposure to “hippie city” brought so much joy to me. I felt like I fit in with the people who lived there. It’s very freeing and has a sweet atmosphere to it. I believe this is what helped me to become the person I am now and am continuing to grow into being. I’m sure my mom has told many people that I’m a hippie which is quite true. I wouldn’t have become a free little thing without the help of my mom and her driving me to Asheville multiple times. Once I experienced how nice it was to simply be a nice person without care for many worldly desires, I was overcome by this feeling of strength and being free. I’ve always been a strong person, but seeing as how freeing I was becoming made me feel stronger like really nothing could tear me down.
I used to be very self-conscious about my weight, my acne, and my personality. I’ve always been a smaller girl, but I gained a few extra pounds my eighth grade and freshman year. Though it wasn’t a big difference, I just felt so gross and sluggish. This made me just hate myself. Then I started getting acne. At first I didn’t care because everyone liked me for me. Then girls started wearing makeup to become “prettier” and they were telling me that I should wear it because I’d be prettier too, especially since it would cover up my acne. As far as my personality, I’ve always been outgoing and not scared to befriend or talk to someone new. However, I started to feel like an outcast when I didn’t want to do the things that my peers were interested in doing. I didn’t know if I was just weird or what. I have now accepted that I’m not just some follower. I am a leader. I am glad I only do the things I feel comfortable doing. I am strong.
Near the end of summer, July 27th to be exact, I got dreadlocks. Me getting dreads helped to shape the hippie lifestyle I’m trying to live. They help me feel rooted to my inner self and connected to the world I love. At GSSM, I’m not judged for my hairstyle like I would be if I still went to my old school. Nor does anyone care that I’m a free spirit. GSSM is so diverse that it brings everyone together and I get to experience all different types of lifestyles, personalities and cultures while becoming who God made me to be. I am not bullied at my new school like I was at previous schools so I’ve gained much more confidence and peace within me. I can now honestly say I love me for me and wish everyone else would do the same for themselves. We humans don’t need all these materials things to make us feel better about ourselves or entertain us. The material kind of happiness is very short and leads to self-destruction, I believe. Everyone should join together and simply love one another because we are all humans. No one is completely the same so there will NEVER be an ideal “perfect” person or body. That means no self-hate is allowed, just loving ourselves exactly how we were born. If I, another random person in this world, can believe in myself and be at peace even with these worldly distractions, so can y’all. Spread love, peace, and happiness! Kloie